“I feel physically sick, nauseated, dizzy, and so heart broken…”
I never even imagined it would be this difficult to tell my husband’s children about the diagnosis of cancer. I feel physically sick, Nauseated, Dizzy and Heart Broken, and worse we had to send this information through an email because gathering them all together just wasn’t going to happen anytime soon.
It’s been a pretty stressful day, my husband went in for his second chemo treatment today.
He was in good spirits today though and went off to work right after his shot of Velcade. Later I took my mom to the doctors, a doctor we all share, and she pulled me aside to ask about my husband and mentioned his parents having gone to see her the other day and how she realized they had no clue about the cancer. That prompted us to decide to tell his kids, all adults, all working and living in other areas. We choose to tell them via email and not wait for fear that they might hear this from someone else. In all my 46 year and even after composing my father’s eulogy this email has to be the top most difficult emails for me to have to compose.
We kept the information short and to the point and asked them to come see us or call us so we can talk more. On Wednesday we are visiting his parents to tell them a more rosy all is well version. They are both in their mid 80s and his both physically not well, our major concern is not to make his mother whom we adore and is one of the sweetest most giving people I’ve ever met suffer with this knowledge.
So this is how we’ve dished out this information, it feels so impersonal but that seems to be the way of our young adults everything via text or email.
So as of now we are on to hoping that he doesn’t get the horrible hiccups again this time around as they cut his steroids in half, so far he’s had no sign of them returning but the last time they didn’t start till 5:30am on the Tuesday following treatment.
keeping our fingers crossed.